Mythbusting Romance

   It's been a month. Hey. It's been a while, and within that whole month of no posts, I lost so many topics I could write. Because procrastination. And also because 3rd year college. But I digress again.

   After a few events within the past month, I learned some answers to a few things, namely 1) Destiny vs. Free Will 2) Romantic Love Dynamics 3) Some other stuff.

   Well, for once I think free will was actually winning, and I was this close to re-believing that maybe it exists, and that maybe we're not just predestined to do things because every fiber and molecule of our being was destined to do those things, but as I said, it was close. Although I do switch it up to "If it's meant to be, it will be" and "If you want it, go get it," and I think that for the longest time that has been my personal dichotomy on life outlook, but a certain, cheeky person has made me realize many things that I already did realize, but chose not to believe in. That maybe things aren't exactly set in stone, not even the advice that Facebook gives you, and not even your own beliefs once someone rocks your whole way of thinking. I'd usually be torn between routing my life basing it on either destiny or through my own will. But neither of them are actually good alternatives, because success is subjective, and that means a safe zone or a "go-to" method isn't advisable, because one of these days, it's auto-piloting life that will get you killed. Be aware. Be conscious of what you're doing. Know what you have to do and how to do it. And as for what to believe in, chance or self-will, the answer would always be the balance of those two. So, thanks to tumblr and Facebook (lol), the best motto would be "If it's meant to be, it's up to me." Yes, maybe in life, there are certain people that would make you think that they're the one for you. But let me emphasize that it's PEOPLE, not just one person. There are probably plenty of people that are "right" for you, but in the end you still have to choose who that person has to be. The signs won't be there most of the time. If they are there, then go for it, and if they aren't, then look for them. Make those signs for yourself. Move. Act. Live.

   I think that romantic movies ruin a lot of people's judgement when it comes to dealing with real romantic relationships. Because the cliche is that random strangers eventually become inseparable forces of love that overcome their greatest challenge as lovers, and it ends "happily ever after." But worry not, reality is always there to set you straight with a backhand to the face. First off, life isn't a movie, so stop hoping. Do something about it. It doesn't have to be something grand. It doesn't have to be something drastic. Just... do something different if things aren't working out right now. You can schedule your weekends but you can't schedule your attitude towards the circumstances given to you, and you certainly can't believe in something like love at first sight. That's just passion in a moment, but in the end it fades, because it was only infatuation. There's still commitment and intimacy to target in order for love to be consummate or complete... Yet in practice, you can't even apply the triangular theory of love (Sternberg thnx) to the current situation, because who has time to think about the implications of a theory when the person you love is at your vicinity? What does it matter when you're both happy anyways? Well, to that I say "there's the future to think about." Because most of the time, feelings fade or fall apart, and you can't help but feel that, at some point in a relationship, maybe the whole thing was just some strong crush, or maybe you're not cut out to be a couple, or maybe the person you love is with you just out of curiosity and/or boredom. Well, two things: One is that the theory is certainly a good thing to have, and two, is that falling in love is never just a feeling that won't go away. It starts with a feeling. It lives on through a decision.

   And for the other stuff... I think I've found the answer to many things. But I also feel extremely dumb, because it took a person to make me understand that I had nothing to worry about, and that the answers were already there but I just didn't have enough faith in them. I wanted my own answers, but in truth, we all arrive at the same conclusion anyways; we'll just have different words for it. So in a sense, we're just looking for the best possible combination of words that makes the most sense out of the life we live in. Because we're never satisfied with what other people find unless it hits us right in that spot in your head that tells you that "this is it." Because to ourselves, the things we discover in our lonesome are the "truer" truths. And we attribute those truth to us because they "fit better" with our current circumstances, and the brain just makes that click in us. So did I find my answers? Yes. But not all of them. Questioning what's in store is always part of the package. So my search continues for all the answers I want. It's time to live.